Sunday

TOP SEVEN SIGNS TO TELL IF YOU'RE IN A HORROR MOVIE.


HE'S BEHIND YOU!!!
1.If you're a teenager and you have sex, you will be dread before the night is over.
2.Any character shouting:"Is anyone there?" will always discover that yes,someone is there, and they have a big axe/gun/knife and now know where to find you.Similarly, anyone who says:"I'll be right back" clearly won't.
3.The "he looks dead so I'll stop running and stand near him" ruse, where the killer is clearly just waiting before making the audience jump one last time.Surely no one should be surprised by this "twist" any more?
4.At the end the killer really is dead-except there is one final hinting he may nonetheless recover from multiple gunshot wounds and beheading,just in case the film is a hit and someone subsequently decides to cash in with a sequel.
5.Young women with big breasts running away from the murderer will always stumble.(Is this a gravity thing?)
6.He's viciously stabbing,maiming and slaughtering people because his mother didn't love him.
7.If you've escaped the maniac, reached the car and you found your car keys, rest assured the engine won't start first time.Or second time.But just as he reaches you and hacks through the soft-top, that dead battery/loose conection rights itself and you escape.But he's probably now in the back seat.

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